Scars
by Lilac088
Summary: A hospital bed, a sick agent and a worried partner; the perfect recipe for love. One-shot.


Apologies for any spelling/grammatical errors.

* * *

Derek diverted his eyes from the pile of consults on his desk to the brunette profiler opposite him. He frowned as he noticed the grimace on her face. Something told him that it wasn't due to the paperwork Hotch had dumped on them a couple of hours earlier. Placing his pen down he studied her further. Prentiss was gripping the paper in her hands hard. Her nails almost punching holes. Her eyes were closed and lips pressed together tight. That was until an involuntary gasp escaped her lips further gaining the attention of Derek Morgan. Something was wrong.

"You alright over there Prentiss?" Derek waited for a response, anticipating a snarky comment from her lips. He started to brainstorm methods to get her to admit she wasn't feeling well so he could get her to rest for once in her life.

But there was no snarky response. Not even a sentence. Rather an uncharacteristic whimper was uttered and Derek Morgan's heart jumped into his throat.

He quickly moved from his desk to kneel next to Emily's chair, his hand instinctively moving across her back as hers moved to her stomach. She was bent over uncomfortably with her raven locks covering her face. No, sticking to her face. Through them, Morgan could make out her sickly pallor and tears rolling down her cheeks. He rubbed circles over the silk fabric of her blouse to provide some comfort but after a few minutes, he doubted that it was working at all.

Emily could barely breathe as pain seared through her abdomen. It felt as if her insides were twisting into knots and tearing themselves apart. This couldn't be good and she was starting to worry. In the months after Doyle, she had experienced all sorts of pain as the result of her injury but this was something different. Something she had never experienced before and it was scaring her. It was at that moment that Emily realised she didn't want to die again. She couldn't leave them now. Not like this. Not here. Not when everything was still so wrong.

His heart was beating at what felt like a million miles per minute as he mentally considered what could be wrong. His brain scrambled through any bit of medical knowledge he possessed but it always ended with the same thought. She is going to leave them again. She is going to leave _him_ again. He was brought out of this circular thought pattern as a strained sentence left her lips. A sentence he never thought he would hear coming from her. Emily Prentiss, the queen of compartmentalisation and stoicism never admitted weakness.

"It hurts so much."

The words were like a knife to his heart. Images of a bloodied Emily, slowly having the life drained out of her, lying on a dirty basement floor charged into his mind. _Not again. God please not again._ Before he got a chance to reply, Emily suddenly lurched and violently vomited onto the floor besides Derek, spectacularly missing the trash can she was aiming for. She had no chance to apologise for getting some of her stomach contents on Derek's black shoes as the spasms in her stomach continued with a vengeance. The continuous retching sounds had gained the attention the rest of the team who gathered around the pair, all sporting the same look of concern and discomfort at the scene before them.

"Morgan you better dive her home." Hotch said as he caught a glimpse of vomit on the floor.

_Home?_ She didn't need to go home. She needed a hospital Derek thought. The vomiting had stopped but Emily seemed far away. Lost in a world where there was nothing good. Lifting her chin up Derek looked for reassurance in her unfocused and glassy brown eyes. He didn't find any and her head rolled against his chest as he removed his hand from her chin.

"Emily, can you hear me?" Finally, a response from her as she managed to lift her own head up towards him. "Do you think you can stand up?" Derek asked and Emily remained still for a few seconds as she struggled to come up with an answer.

"Maybe it's appendicitis?" JJ offered, remembering her own experience many years ago as a teenager.

"I think I'm ok. The pain...the pain it's not as bad now." A slightly breathless Emily announced and waved her hand about in an attempt to shoo them away from her. Derek's heart returned to a somewhat normal rhythm at this classic Prentiss behaviour. He never thought he would be glad to see her trying to get everyone to stop worrying about her.

Emily reached for the glass of water located on her desk and Derek immediately passed it to her, watching intensely as she took a few sips. Slowly, with Derek's arms wrapped tightly around her slender frame she stood up and started gathering her things. JJ quickly intervened and collected her bag. With Morgan's hands supporting her, together they made it five steps towards the elevator before she became a dead weight in his arms.

"Emily!"

* * *

The smell of antiseptic burnt his nostrils. The bright light reflecting off the white walls gave him a headache. The incessant tapping noise caused by Rossi's fingers against the cheap wood side table was driving him up the wall_. How much longer did they have to wait?_ The ambulance had come and gone with a barely conscious Emily transported to the hospital. Once again he had found himself being forced to let go of her as doctors and nurses pushed him away and out of the treatment room. Only this time he didn't think she wanted to be let go of.

It was all a blur for Derek. He remembered her face, the fear in her eyes, then not seeing her eyes anymore as she drifted further and further away from him. She was terrified. Something he never witnessed before. Not even in that basement seven months ago. That display of fear from her panicked him like nothing before. He cursed himself for not being able to answer the questions the staff threw at him. JJ stepped in a relayed a bunch of information regarding Emily's medical history and allergies. He just stood there, his mind blank apart from one thought. _I've lost her._

"Emily Prentiss?" A relatively young doctor appeared at the door dressed in blue scrubs and a friendly smile. "I'm looking for an agent Jareau, you have agents Prentiss' medical power of attorney." JJ stepped forward and nodded in agreement.

"Would you like to follow me please?" The doctor directed her to the door however, the blonde remained where she was and looked back at the team behind her.

"We are all family. Please just say what you need to." JJ pleaded and the doctor sighed at the group of FBI agents that had crowed in the small waiting room before continuing.

"Agent Prentiss had an intestinal obstruction that was caused by scar tissue from her previous abdominal trauma. The scar tissue formed a band around her bowel which meant it couldn't receive adequate blood flow and started to die."

For the second time that day, Derek Morgan couldn't speak. He simply couldn't comprehend what he was hearing. Part of her was dying while he was sat there doing paperwork? Again, he had let her slip through his fingers.

"We managed to clear the obstruction and repair the bowel. We were lucky that the damage to the tissue was limited otherwise it could have been far worse. Even fatal." Everyone cringed at the doctor's last words, never wanting to come that close to losing anyone again. "She also has an infection but we are hopeful that the combination of antibiotics she is on will be enough to clear it. All in all, your colleague has been extremely lucky."

* * *

It was too like before she thought. On the ground in unmeasurable pain. Derek's distraught face looking over her. The world closing in around her. The darkness approaching. Emily Prentiss was convinced, Ian Doyle was never going to stop haunting her.

"I was scared Derek" Emily whispered, properly speaking for the first time since she had awoken from her surgery a few hours ago. Derek had been by her side since the Doctor had let them visit and they both had sat in silence. That was until now.

Slightly shocked by her sudden admission Derek remained quiet. He simply moved his chair closer to her body and waited for her to continue. Years of working together had given them a unique way to communicate without words. He could see that she wanted to talk to him. Open up to him. For the first time since she had returned. Hell, for the first time forever.

"I actually thought I was going to die today." She wasn't looking at Derek, rather staring upwards at the tiled ceiling. "And I was terrified. I couldn't control it."

"Hey, come on. You don't need to be thinking about that now." Derek spoke as he reached over to catch a stray tear falling down her face with his thumb.

"He will never leave me alone." Her voice was barely audible. Suddenly her head jerked towards him and she was focused on his face, barely suppressing the mountain of pain building up inside of her. "I think I was meant to die in that basement." This time she spoke clearly.

Morgan was not sure where this conversation was heading when she had started to speak but sure as hell, he hadn't expected this. Not something so gut-wrenching as the words that were coming out of her mouth.

"Why would you say something like that?" Morgan quickly concluded that it must be a mixture of pain and medication that was making her slightly hysterical.

"Nothing has felt right since I returned. I know the team feel it too. I have no place here anymore." She continued on. With one hand Emily was gripping the sheets by her thigh, scrunching the sheet into a tight ball, and with the other, she was digging her nails into her thigh. Desperate to remain in control.

"Emily stop!" He grabbed both her hands and brought them close to his chest. "You've just had surgery, you aren't thinking clearly. You need to rest."

And then it all came crashing out of her. All the pain. All the uncertainty. "I died! I should be dead!"

Her body convulsed as she cried out. Realising that Emily was about to do herself further damage, Morgan desperately tried to calm her down. Careful of her incision, he guided her back down against the bed. Moments away from calling out for a doctor, it was a relief when Derek felt her body relax beneath him and the forceful cries stopped. He leaned down to place a kiss in her soft hair as Emily succumbed to exhaustion.

"You will always have a place with me" he whispered, shutting his eyes and holding himself as close to her as physically possible. Emily let out a delicate sob in response and reached for his hand. She was safe now. He wouldn't let go again and neither would she.

There was absolutely nothing romantic about the situation. A hospital bed, a sick agent and a worried partner. But it seemed in that moment, in that hospital room, something clicked. No words were spoken by either party but both knew what this meant. As they held each other, body and souls connected, they knew. They loved each other. This realisation was not particularly romantic either. No, it was raw with vulnerability and honesty. They couldn't lose each other again.

Emily looked up at him and behind the haze caused by a cocktail of antibiotics and pain medications was an acceptance in her eyes. Acceptance of the love that had been there for many years but not dared touched upon. An acceptance that she could be happy again. That she deserved to be happy.

There was still much to be said. Emotions to be worked through and wounds to be healed. Still, they may have not realised it then but this was the start of something new.

"I'm here to stay princess. And so are you. Me and you together."

* * *

Thank you so much for reading. Not 100% happy with this but I liked the idea. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and favourites/reviews are very welcome. Halfway through an update for my other story so hopefully that will be up soon.


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